Barren
by YamiYumes
Summary: Daedra Cousland accepts Morrigan's ritual, yet it hurts her far more deeply than she would let on. Alistair/F!Cousland angst and hurt/comfort.


_Author's Note: I do not own Dragon Age or any of the characters within. All rights go to Bioware for these awesome characters. _

"Do not be alarmed," Morrigan said softly, turning to face the Grey Warden. "It is only I."

Daedra's hands relaxed, having immediately gone to the hilts of Duncan's sword and dagger. A tired smile pulled her lips as she stepped into her room, closing the door behind her. "Morrigan? Is everything all right?"

"I am well," the witch replied, frowning. "Tis you who are in danger." Morrigan moved to the side, letting Daedra slide past to her bed. "I have a plan, you see. A way out. The loop in your hole."

Daedra perched at the edge of her bed, an eyebrow arching. "Oh? Do tell."

"I know what happens when the archdemon dies," Morrigan said bluntly. Her eyes held compassion for the Warden, and Daedra felt the anxiety rear up once again. "I know a Grey Warden must be sacrificed, and that sacrifice could be you. I have come to tell you this does not need to be."

"Does not need to be?" Daedra said, her eyes narrowing. "Riordan was rather clear: one of us must be the one to kill it, otherwise all is for naught."

"I offer a way out," Morrigan repeated patiently, shifting uncomfortably. "It's a way out for all the Grey Wardens, that there need be no sacrifice." She was nervously wringing her hands now, and Daedra resisted the urge to shake the words out of her. "It's a ritual...performed on the eve of battle, in the dark of night."

"You make it sound so simple, yet you seem to be troubled," Daedra said coldly, her stomach coiling in on itself. "I don't trust this. From where did you get this ritual, Morrigan?"

"From Flemeth, of course," the witch said as though it was nothing at all. "I have known about it for some time, now."

"So you knew about the sacrifice before Riordan told me?" Daedra snarled, taking a step toward the other woman.

"I did," Morrigan said, her voice breaking as her mask shattered. Her voice was agonized. "Would you have believed me if I had been the one to tell you? I have my doubts, even though I consider you a sister to me."

All anger in Daedra vanished as she realized the truth of the witch's words. "You saw what was happening between Alistair and I," she said, fists clenched. "I wouldn't have believed you for the hope that it wouldn't be true, and I would have been wrong in distrusting you. I'm sorry."

"I have a way, however," Morrigan said, and she couldn't meet the Warden's eyes. "The ritual is thus: convince Alistair to lay with me. Here, tonight, and from this a child shall be conceived within me." At this, she looked up to her friend and Daedra realized why she was suddenly so torn.

"You don't know what you're asking of me," Daedra whispered, despair rippling through her.

"I do and I'm sorry," Morrigan replied, gently taking the other woman's hand. "The child will bear the taint, and when the archdemon is slain its essence will seek the child out like a beacon." Daedra was crying, and Morrigan squeezed her hand. "I do not do this to hurt you, my friend. Is such a thing so high a price for what time I can give you together? Once the rite is done, the only thing I ask is to be left to raise the child as I see fit."

"What will the child become?" Daedra said, her hands shaking. "Some kind of darkspawn?"

"Not at all," Morrigan said. "It will be a child that houses the untainted soul of an Old God. The Gods were beautiful once, before the Taint...and I seek to preserve that beauty."

"What if Alistair wished to see the child?" The Warden's voice was ragged, the question acid in her throat.

"I have no doubt he may," Morrigan told her gently. Daedra lifted her head and met the witch's eyes. Morrigan smiled derisively. "But he will not. It is all I'll ask in return."

Daedra laughed, wiping away her tears. "I would be lying if I said a part of me hoped you would say as much," she said. "But if all you need is a tainted Warden, why not Riordan?"

Morrigan sighed dramatically and Daedra grinned. "Would that he were suitable," she said somberly. "Unfortunately the rite calls for one who hasn't held the taint for very long. Riordan was tainted near as long as Duncan if he were present at Alistair's Joining. You would have been suitable had you been a man, but alas. Alistair it must be."

"Do you actually think Alistair will agree to this?" Daedra asked after a few moments of silence. "I can't imagine he'll be any more enthusiastic about this than you are."

"If you care for him as I know you do, you will convince him to," Morrigan said. "Consider what the alternative might be? Do you honestly believe Alistair will fail in his duty as the future king and not save his country?"

"Never," Daedra said, fierce pride evident in her voice. "He's stronger than I, or else you would have gone to him first."

"Aye," the witch replied, smiling. "I also knew that he would never allow the woman he loved to take a blow that was ever meant for him." The smile faded, and she looked away. "At first I sought to use this against you, but...I never thought I would call you a _friend_." She bowed her head before meeting the Warden's eyes. "However now I offer it as a gift to you, for all that you've done for me. To give you and Alistair the time you deserve, the happiness I can give to you that the Wardens would deny you."

"I...am not happy with the details of your ritual," Daedra said softly. "I will do this because I am weak and selfish. Please don't give me cause to regret trusting you in this."

"If it soothes your emotional hurts any," Morrigan said, standing and turning back towards the fire, "I looked through Flemeth's grimoire far too many times to count, desperately seeking any way to change an individual's sex for a night."

Daedra's laughter trailed after her as she left to speak with her lover.


End file.
